This Time

Wake up laying in the bed.

From a nightmare of seeing the dead surrounding me.

Visualizing how spirits can hunt the living.

So as I lay I thank God I’m still awake.

Drowned just yesterday in my sorrows.

Feeling like time is now.

Standing at a cliff on the edge.

Looking down, seeing a bottomless hole.

Heard a voice say take a leap of faith.

Time is now, if I want to bury my past.

As I say my last prayer, a sign was given.

Didn’t want to see nor hear truth.

Lies of a liar called life.

Why should I fall to see light in darkness.

I thought living was being alive.

How do I believe a guy who enslaved me.

Modern day slavery, when I pay to die.

Pain is pleasure like bitter turned sweet.

Follow the widows peak to get peace.

Take the pill to start saving.

The more I do, the solution goes far from home.

I grab the cross & Bible to give life.

While jumping I never seen a vision so clear.

Brought myself to the point of what’s called suicide.

Being raised up from the barrow.

Born again religion tells me, free from sin.

 

Thanks, everyone for being patient with me. I have been working hard to sustain in life.

This year I will be getting back to the poetry and short stories.

Have a Blessed Day.

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Thoughts For Survival

Hello everyone,

Let me start off by saying anyone that thinks life is not fair, it was never meant to be fair. Yes we all go through situations and ask God why. When really everybody says the same thing everything happens for a reason. So if everything happens for a reason and God allows it, then it must be to show approval. I’m a put it out there for you all to read, I have been living less than paycheck to paycheck for the last 3 yrs. Of course it bothers me, but when you think like I do you just learn to deal with it and go about your way. It’s like no matter how hard you try to do right, it’s always set backs. I was watching the vice presidential debate, and what I received from that was history repeats itself. Meaning when racism and hatred was at an all time high back in the day. Put two and two together and you will see those things coming back to the necked eye, and it’s just getting started. Poverty is now raising to the middle class and modern-day slavery is here. Every time I turn around the politicians is mentioning how it’s going to be either rich, or poor. It hurts to see how the people who make up this whole country fall for the mess they feed us. Everything that happens in the United States, is actually planned. The September 11th event was scheduled originally in the mid 90’s.  How is it that the Americans doesn’t read between the lines. Another thing you know it’s all staged, when in my history class during high school I watched Bin Laden train those kids without the green screen technology. Having a black president is even staged, like the Mr. Kennedy killing. I’m not trying to persuade you all at all, all I want you to do is read and watch how things happens in America. It’s wild how those that do make a career out of living off the system. I do agree with Romney about taking those that’s on Housing off, because they’re not the ones that pay taxes. For us that pay taxes for the others that abuse the system I can’t stand the most. Reason being is because when one of us hard workers that may have a rough patch, gets denied for help. Just because those people who use the tax payers money just as well as the prisons. I don’t get while the money we pay taxes with goes towards those that don’t deserve the three hots and a cot. I work  hard and sometimes can’t eat three times a day. Back to the Government I can’t stand how they only out to build the rich people pockets and the ones that’s need a break can’t get ahead. History didn’t lie though America was founded on lies and greed. To this very day those disgracing principles are still among us now. All I know all of us have the same organs and all have the same life spans. It’s just that some of us is not going to compromise our dignity to reach fame and fortune.  So now that I gave you enough to think about, just sleep on that for a while.

Everyone please take interest to be honest with yourselves about what’s going on in the world. Another big thought to think about, “Rich People” only donate and start foundations to get people around the world like the middle class to support them.  Really all it is when they do it, it’s considered a tax write off. Last time I checked donations is something you do from the heart and not for what you can get in return. For instance if I start a cancer foundation and gain fans plus a tax credit, I basically gained what I have donated plus more. Just open your eyes and think hard and be honest when doing so.

Please leave a comment, or email the blog address Broadwayknowledgeblog@yahoo.com to inform me on what you think about my messages I give.

Peace, love and hair grease.

One For The Road

Hello World,

I will like to let you all know I am going back to Texas in a couple of days. For those that don’t know I’m in Saint Louis, the place I am originally from. I have been residing in TX for the last five years, but decided to move back to the STL thinking that will solve somethings. Overall it honestly did, I have realized home is where I want to make it and not where I’m from. Also I have had heart to heart conversations with those I decided to filter out my life for the last five or more years. It feels good to put a foundation down and build something with them I lost contact with over small reason really. One thing about me I can shelter people out, but today is a new day and I will walk with my head held high and have no harsh feelings towards anyone that I once did. These few months I been in the LOU has gave me more insight than I expected for real. I enjoyed myself these past few months, it wasn’t bad as I first thought. Chilled with a few of the old team, Killa Cam, Meech aka Mardi, Big Cuz Tankee. It was straight to be back in the LOU to get things ironed out.Oh yeah Yakima Donald big sis I loved having family time on Mondays for Hip Hop Atlanta At my crib. You and K Marie have a spot when you ready holler at you brother. Last but not less my grandmother on my real father side, Ms Johnson; she really genuinely loves and cares, just never wanted to open doors that I felt would’ve hurt. Now I feel it happened in God’s timing and it was meant for this time. We chilled for an hour and talked all about me and my ladies, not about the parents and I was relieved. It’s existing to be going back to the Lone Star feeling like a lot was accomplished on this journey, I didn’t understand at first. I actually hung out with three of my little brothers on my father side, they got mad respect for your boy who never grew up around them. I think everything is going to continue to mold me into something great before my appointment to see JESUS. I know I crack a lot of dangerous jokes about the after life in heaven or hell,but I really feel God gave me this sense of humor to uplift me when I hurt like using my writing as a weapon.  Anyone that wants to reach me use the blog email, or let me know and I will contact you by text, or phone. I love being a social butterfly, thanks to TX. Man that state helps me and loves me. The Show Me State does to a certain degree, but no love lost only gained. My SS Mino Johnson Love Boat is signing out for a while.

Please bare with me and stay tuned.

Peace,Love and Hair Grease.

Woke Up Feeling Good

Hello Everybody,

 This morning was great, had some one on one time wife the wife before starting the day. After I arrived at work the dark clouds started to surround the area. Of course you can guess what happened next, rain, rain and more rain. Though it is pouring recycled water over and over, it still is a good day. For those that don’t know, I am getting ready to move back home to the Lone Star state. I sent an application off to the apartments I will like to move into. Asking God to once again favor me and my ladies to get where we want to go. I know I was hard-headed and moved without his consent, but I have learned not to move within my feelings. Every time I start to think about my finances I start to worry, but God say don’t worry in good doings. So I am going to try to hold fast to his power and faith. I do know once I get back to where I belong in “God’s Country” I will be fine all over again. I should never let someone discourage me from being happy and enjoying myself. I vow I will put up with the extra stuff, than to move my family into an uncomfortable place ever again. I love  my family and relatives, I know you may be thinking why say both in the same sentence. In this case family is people you can argue/ fight with and still be there when it counts. Relatives are those that only come around, or keep in contact when they are in need of whatever.  Deep down I know I won’t have the dream team I want, but I can make the best of all the company from all angles. I will just have to separate the pieces and play my part to keep things assembled. The division in my families are keeping me stand-offish, not trying to be rude, just wanting to keep peace and hold me sane. It’s hard being a person that’s young and a black sheep trying to stand your ground to everyone that’s much older and don’t respect you in some way. Overall I don’t harbor any feelings towards it, I just know long as I got me that’s what really matters. Let me get back to what I really started off thinking about. Sorry for the loop, a customer at my job stopped me to help with some garden hardware. I want to do right by those that stand behind me. If I somehow let you down, hey don’t forget you let someone else down as well. Man I know how to flip the script, I’m good at that. This year I do plan to vote, but only for the politician that gives the better support for those in the middle class. Most likely Obama, just saying he came from the Chi where things are tough, like Saint Louis. I wanted to throw that out there, he has his motives to, but it’s not going to hurt blacks and browns like if Romney gets in office. I need grants and things of that nature to go to school, but being that he is rich now he forgot where he came from apparently. Then on top of that Romney wants to convict every female that gets abortions, but don’t want to stop what’s really killing us. Wow politicians are crazy, so I may not vote, nah I am. Lost track of time again so I am going to get back to my day job. Another out of space thought, I have gotten better with my spelling errors.

Have A Good Day.

The Best Of My Moods

 

Let’s come take a walk with me.

Things are really taking a turn for the worse.

You all should know I’m finally here.

I do need people to pray for me.

I wake up feeling hunted by the screams of people.

Telling me all the wrong I have done.

As they come to me one by one, I see no face.

I was once someone who could be calm, then flip out.

I know how it may seem, I’m a bad boy.

Never meant to conjure up anger, and bitterness.

I wish I could tell you my hurt, but you would only run from me.

As for me I see life as a ball while I’m shackled.

I know I will never see why the lessons.

One day it should come to a stop, and not be brief.

Trying to give my all, so I can keep you all around.

It’s hard how things don’t turn out like I visioned.

Is this the way it suppose to be.

If tomorrow is not promised, why can’t we stay happy long enough to see the world.

I want me and old homies to kick it.

All they see is I left and created a large bridge, to far to cross.

I can reintroduce myself I am Broadway.

I can not sit and watch things fly by.

My sister Chaz Jones let me know how to recognize the big picture.

She was my reality check, she was young and couldn’t overcome her obstacle.

She passed at a young age and left a lil man.

I wish I would’ve been there to help with the broken pieces.

Chaz you the reason why I know how a strong person can live and show no anger with the illness.

Know I miss you, I check on the fam every chance I get.

Let me know in my dreams if I am living up to what a friend is.

You helped me through a lot of tragic situations in life.

You helped encourage me when I got married, trying to be there for me.

I couldn’t return the favor, since I couldn’t tell Jesus not now.

Rest in Peace sis, I can’t figure out why you were the most positive person in my life even when you was timed.

Now that so much has pasted me up, I’m going crazy .

Maybe I attract drama, don’t know if it’s just the trend life is obsessed with.

I feel like hell on earth, is keeping me from moving forward.

Patience is something I can’t provide, since things don’t give me time.

Like you want to know, why I can’t say I’m going to make life treasure.

Most situations pull me under, and chase me to the winehouse.

Knowing I’m fresh out the rehab.

My dreams and visions can make you think hard.

Blink just once you can be consumed by my inception.

I feel like an old soul, why looking like misery.

I feel like I’m stuck in my time, I try to do different things just stay the same.

Don’t you criticize me for being me, when I don’t know who I am.

I’m numb to the hurt, so I’m overlooked and misunderstood.

Everything I know to do right, I sense to do wrong.

Hopefully my daughter grows up to be there for me, knowing how guilty I am.

Hopefully my wife can get to understand me, and don’t suppress.

I just want to be different, but still stay the same under the sun.

I’m always on the outside looking in.

I can see through you, even though I’m selfish.

I look in the mirror and feel I’m not desirable.

I don’t let up, so you can let me down.

Don’t dim my lights to slight me.

You looking for someone to blame, I can’t be that solution.

I pour my heart over my words and you still try to thrill me.

You can never drill me, to derail me.

I fall and get up and I’m still me.

Some of you all say you love me, but then somehow it’s not the same.

Most of you don’t see my growth, only my failures in some positions.

Some folks are so naive, not me I go insane.

I’m immune to the depression, so it may be my brain.

High off more than life, got more than what’s in the pupil of the eye.

A lot of you always throw out thoughts like grace.

It may have to be unforgiving that I can’t move at the pace as others.

I’m only just being me, I love me more.

Uplifting you when I can’t get up, how does that work.

I love the pain, and suffering.

I’m successful off my own admission.

Long way to go, after I wake up out this coma.

I see the spot light, where the sun burns my skin.

We are like birds with feathers.

Guess the fake is going to relax the real.

Truth can kill, if you with draw.

I have to stay calm, being that the ones who probably love me most is dead and gone.

My inspiration comes from the way of walking.

Don’t ask me to break up like the balls on the pool table.

Stress and my soul makes pleasure, that cause hurt.

These are my issues so we never really met.

I’m out…..

Thanks for taking another ride with me.

Walk With Life

I’m tired of fighting, but now I’m reaching weak. use to be a strong warrior, now wishing horror would come and see me.Don’t care to win the battle just settle for losing. Do’s and don’t can get you hurt for not having self works. I want to lose the people who pretend to care and love. They all don’t mean no good. Sorry I wanted more from this, I quit. Trust and love was made to be broken. Harsh words and feelings were born to be spoken. Wonder if life was for me, who’s here to see me better off. Really soft on taking a lost, but so be it, if it came across. Don’t want to paint a better picture, no sunshine. Only cloudy and stormy skies, from all dirty trials. Sick of the rainy days, want to get well soon. Just take me now Lord, no matter if its my doom. Pain and struggle is all I know, so show me the door. Walking through with a sense of peace. I think I hate life for what it can bring. Wish I could wake up, and this would all be a dream. Dog on it, this ain’t what I pictured my life like. Whats next for me, will it get better. Not a suicide note, just thoughts in the seas. Going through the motions not thinking clear. One day will be my time and I wont show no fear. Tears drain from my heart, as I lack a soul. Deaths angel coming, while life’s span has taken its toll. all I ever wanted was to be loved and fairly treated. Life showed me different and kept me constantly drinking. It wasn’t just people,it was my purpose. That made me feel worthless, things not going the way I worked for. Chasing the good with the bad, is like drowning in snow. It’s a cold world we live in. God where is my strength you been giving. Can’t blame you for feeling like everybody else. All they say is I brought it on myself.Getting to a better place is hard, when harboring on bad thoughts and feelings. No truth in lying about wrong doings, we both were wrong. So just own up to it. My fault for being disgusted with you, and mad at you. I need help, all you do is have at it. Getting under my skin. I hate the BS in between us, no love or trust in between us.Don’t act as if religion means everything, don’t play me or this can become your worst dream. Life ain’t what it seems to be, dying on the inside. With my heart that cries, bleeding daily. How can I take it, just knock me off. I’m not scared of death, its a part of life’s plan. Wish I can start again, make better choices. Stay away from the crazies, forget the judging. I maybe wrong,but Lord take me. Tired of waiting, not good with patience. Thankful for my daughter, the only light in my tunnel. I’m faced with the challenges of life. Wrong or right, bless my love ones to make it through the night. Watching to many past before me, wish it were myself. I will be glad when the world end, won’t have to go through this suffering. Still want a change of heart, but lets take the low road instead. Wasn’t them, but just me. Life ain’t fair, I swear this ain’t meant for us. If it was because of Adam and Eve, I wish them a life time of pain for what they caused us. Dangerous, from here to hell, sorry I can’t help, but be myself.
 

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